Dan Waldschmidt: Strategist, Speaker, Author » destiny

Sacrifice, Destiny, and the Lies We Tell Ourselves.

Dan Waldschmidt — Thu, 03 Mar 2011 14:10:29 +0000

We have grown uncomfortable with the idea of sacrifice.

Not the pretentious self-limitations of overindulgence we like to think of as sacrifice.

Something completely different.

Sacrifice that hurts.

It’s the painful endurance of hard decisions. The torturous focus that fights through fatigue. The exacting self-awareness that rises about failure and personal deficiencies.

It’s tough. And honest.

And painful.

And we want sacrifice that is easy.

We want sacrifice that projects grandiose plans and bold ventures and requires limited personal effectation.

And that’s not really sacrifice at all.

It’s a lie.

And not a lie we tell to others.

It’s worse.

It’s the dishonesty we tell ourselves.

Of hyperbole and false hope.

Of pretended endurance and mock anticpation.

And the damage we cause is deep.

We cheat ourselves out of opportunity and destiny by thinking that what is easy can ever replace that which is so very painful.

We forget that what is easy can never be sacrificed.

There’s nothing to endure, to give up, or to conquer.

Sacrifice must be hard.

It must be felt.

Somehow we try to justify that pretention is really lasting investment.

And it is not.

It is simply selfish attitudes and loser actions.

And worse, we lose.

You lose.

You’ve probably been there.

Pacing through the darkness of night, you question your destiny, your dreams, and how much more you can take. The darkness brings worry and thought and hard choices. And as you step anxiously through the hours of the night, impossibility looks like reality. No end in sight. Only darkness.

But if you keep walking and plod and ponder, the horizon begins to brighten. Across the edges of a darkened night, shades of color dash upon the sky. And in this moment you know that the fears of the night have been unshackled. The night is over.

The day of your destiny has dawned.

If you’re in the night, the sacrifice can seem to much. The cause to little.

But the pain you feel now is a small price to pay for the destiny you demand.

Don’t believe the lies you want to tell yourself.

Unlocking the Spartan Inside You.

Dan Waldschmidt — Thu, 17 Feb 2011 14:04:01 +0000

A flustered sigh escapes your lips as you nod your head ever so slowly from side to side. As you lean forward, your hands grab the back of the counter.

Eyes squinting against the shimmer of light that floods the bathroom in the morning hours, you stand staring into the mirror.

Glaring.

Another morning. You have arisen to meet the day.

Tired. Torn. And yet, alive.

And perhaps that is enough.

Perhaps today is all you need.

In the summer of 480 B.C., Xerxes and his Persian army descended on the plains of Greece with a force that shook the world. Ancient sources claim the army to number in the millions. And their ferocity was undeniable. They would not be denied.

And yet a single man dared question that greatness.

As Greece and their allies struggled to assemble several thousand men to meet the defense of their lives, Leonidas I, King of Sparta, gathered his group of bodyguards and made his way through the night to a pass in the mountains called Thermopylae where the Persians had to pass to reach their city.

In the morning, as hundred of thousands of Persians charged their position, the Spartans stood their ground unmoved, unshaken. . They stood with purpose, shoulder to shoulder, brother to brother. Willing to die. Fighting to live. Leonidas leading.

According to an account by Herodotus, “He required them to stand firm – to conquer or die.”

Their fury drove back the Persians. That day and the next and five more days.

Seven days into the battle, a Greek traitor named Ephialtes informed the Persians about a little-know path through the mountains. A way around the pass that Leonidas held with his men. Hearing this, Xerxes ordered Hydarnes and his 10,000 elite bodyguards called the “Immortals” to ascend the mountain and outflank the Spartans. And so through the night they made their journey.

In the morning, the Greek scouts discovered the “Immortals” and reported to Leonidas the treachery. Knowing that death was likely, he gathered his army around them. Anyone who wished to leave was permitted to go with honor. His Spartans would remain and face the Persians.

As the dawn broke first daylight across the top of the hills, the small army of Spartans formed a circle on the hill and waited for the enemy. They would stand and fight. Leonidas would lead them. His 300 soldiers around him.

As the Persians surrounded them, the Spartans fought so ferociously that their opponents “fell in heaps”. The Persian commanders used whips to drive their soldiers at the Spartans who fought with violent desperation. Their swords breaking against the force of the heavy shields of the “Immortals”.

And yet they fought on. As endless wave after wave of Persians descended upon the valiant troop, Leonidas was separated from his men and died — his hand still grasping the sword his lifeless spirit could no longer command.

His troop, so moved by his passing, were enraged and fought the Persians back up the hill to surround their king’s fallen body. They stood in a circle, facing outwards, fighting to the last with their swords. And when their swords broke, they used their hands and teeth. Nothing left but will and a determination to stand.

And when that will was finally crushed by the Persian archers raining down arrows on the soldiers until none were left standing, their bodies lay fallen around Leonidas.

A man who stood up against the mighty Xerxes.

A man against millions.

A man who inspired a nation to rise against conquest and staggering odds and find the fight to be free men. A man who changed the course of history. A man who pushed aside comfort, fear, and a kingdom to pursue his destiny.

So today as you look in the mirror grimacing through the fatigue of fighting for what you hold most dear, remember the Spartan inside you.

And as doubts and fear surround you, fight.

Violently. Furiously.

Fight for the dignity of a destiny that you choose.

And if you fall, rise. Slowly — as you dust off the wounds of failure and loss. But rise.

And meet the day with the noble nod of a warrior. The steady look of a unconquerable champion.

And unlock the Spartan inside you.

One man might be enough to change history.

That man might be you.

Will you stand?

How to Crush Your Sales Mojo in 5 Easy Steps.

Dan Waldschmidt — Wed, 15 Dec 2010 16:34:17 +0000

Ever walk out of a sales meeting with that worried half-frown and sick feeling in your gut?

That sense that something is missing.

That you lost your selling mojo.

It’s so difficult too, because your whole being is screaming out at you to get your mojo back. In that moment, there’s nothing more important that you being back in control of your destiny.

Back in control of the world seemingly crashing down around you.

And you’re sitting there half wondering what caused it in the first place. What did you do to get yourself in that position? And how can you get your sales mojo back as soon as possible?

Well, having mojo is a lot like not being born a genius.

Sometimes the next best thing to doing something amazing is not doing something stupid.

And for most of the time, being amazing (and doing outrageous business things) is about one simple thing — not losing your sales mojo.

About you not doing things that blow up your chances of the greatest success.

About not crushing your own sales mojo.

Here are five of those things:

Selfishly only focusing on yourself – When you think about yourself all the time, you can get pretty depressed. And more than that, when you only look within, you stop looking around at all the opportunities. Those opportunities are the difference between you winning and losing.
Concentrating on the negative parts of life — Life comes at you hard. Non-stop. Your perspective is the difference between landing on your feet and wallowing in the worst of what happens to you.
Deciding not to invest in other people’s success – Giving is the secret to lasting happiness and a sense of fulfillment, You giving your time, your money, and your talents. When you decide not to invest in other people, you lose out on short-term gratification and the personal growth that comes with being mentor. It’s true that “to teach is to learn”…
Letting your emotions rule your decisions — Irrational behavior, while situationally alluring, is the fastest way lose your mojo. Nothing is more destructive and destiny-crushing than letting your emotions (fear, anger, worry, etc…) determine what you do.
Refusing to admit when you are wrong — You can’t learn if you’re never wrong. You won’t get better without making a few mistakes over time. That’s just how life goes. Be glad you’re stumbling and use those lessons to grow your talents even further.

You’re a sales rock star.

You’ve done everything to put yourself in that position. You can stay that way too.

You just need to stop doing the things that cause you to lose your sales mojo.

This post was originally written (a while ago) for my weekly More Mojo column at SalesBlogcast.com in a slightly different format. I re-read it, got inspired, and thought you might enjoy…

124+ Edgy Perspectives to Help you Accomplish the Impossible.

Dan Waldschmidt — Tue, 23 Nov 2010 14:02:21 +0000

Are you looking to accomplish something amazing? Something so astonishingly disruptive and overwhelmingly applaudable that the world around you is never the same.

It’s a lot simpler that it might seem.

It just takes a new way of thinking. A new outlook on life, your problems, and your potential.

Changing the world requires an edgy perspective.

And, so, here is the (unabridged) A-to-Z of edgy perspectives.

More than 124 unique takes on what it takes to accomplish the impossible.

Action

Create your own ‘self-inertia’ by replacing worry with action.

Attitude

Destiny is not about what other people do to us. It is about our attitude in determining our own responses to life.
Spend the time you worry about what other people think about you, obsessively working on what you are most passionate about.
When life gives you lemons, throw them back.
Personal motivation starts with the right view of every situation. Attitude, after all, is what keeps you going.
The last straw didn’t break the camel’s back. The camel allowed his back to be broken by not shrugging off the straws that others kept piling up.

Bad Judgment

Bad judgment is like hypothermia— your body and mind want to go to sleep, but you’ll end up dead if you allow yourself to succomb to the emotion of that moment.

Battle

The battlefield of business is not for the faint-of-heart. Stay at home if you don’t want to be shot at.

Being.

Winning has to be a philosophy rather than only a result…
‘WE’ are the great differentiator and as far as ‘WE’ can push ourselves is as far as ‘WE’ will ever go to realizing our goals…
Knowing that within YOU is the ability to change the world is the first step in making a difference.
Success is not a “sometime” thing. It is a philosophy, a habit, a way of life.
Sometimes the best sense of “having it all together” is an understanding that “being normal” isn’t really all that attractive!
Being memorable is an investment made long before the gain is realized…

Belief.

Until you believe that you are all you need, you probably won’t find yourself accomplishing outrageously enviable success…

Breakthrough.

Experiencing success is not so much about getting to the goal line as it is about getting past the point of breakthrough.

Caring.

Caring is the different between the struggle for survival or the the passionate pursuit of excellence. With one, you succeed at living and with the other you live to succeed…

Changing the World.

Changing the world is not just a possibility; we are doing it whether we want to or not.

Choices

Making tough choices involves evaluating values, determination, and current goal structure through your current perspective.

Conflict.

Nothing worthwhile gets done without conflict.

Conversations.

If you wouldn’ t kick down your customer’ s door and start spitting sales facts in his face in person, then don’ t do it with your emails.
Being more productive in sales is about having conversations with your clients.
If the average conversation lasts 2.3 minutes and the average sales pitch is 23 minutes, your prospects stopped listening more than 20 minutes ago.

Courage.

Do not apologize for greatness, achieve it.
The path to full potential travels through the valley of set-backs.
If you have to give up, give up your fear.
Courage is not no much a single big action as it is a series of small and seemingly insignificant ways of living.
Passionate curiosity rarely loses.

Destiny.

Dream without limits. Live without regrets
To find true purpose, pursue passion…
Our destiny is not determined by what happens to us, but how we react to what happens to us; not by what life brings to us as a destiny, but by the attitude we bring to life in determining our destiny.

Determination.

What separates us from each other is our will to win.
Instead of working smarter than harder, do both…
Calculate success by the number of times you continue rather the the number of times you start.
There are times when failure seems the only option. It is then, at this moment, that you must not give up the battle.
Fighting always leads to winning! If you disagree, you probably stopped fighting.
It’s not what you are willing to do that will make you successful. It’s what you are willing to do without until you get there.
The choice to persevere in spite of overwhelming obstacles is the single biggest factor in achieving success.

Discipline.

Discipline drives our dreams toward success.

Dreams.

It is only when we allow ourselves to dream of impossibilities that we can muster the human courage to attain a limitless destiny…

Effort.

If today was the day you were finally going to win, did you show up?
You can’t always control if you win. You can control if you try again.
Most of us want our circumstances to improve, yet few of us are willing to do much about changing them.
Trying is the idea of ‘winning in the moment’… I can not control the universe beyond myself, but I can control my response to the forces that affect my WILL to survive and flourish.
The ‘E’ in Effort stands for ‘ Everything’.
Effort is the only factor in life that is solely within our own control.
The resolve to try again is a powerful differentiator between those who are successful and those are not.

Excellence.

Jealousy is the price mediocrity pays to excellence.
It’ s not the resources you have but how resourceful you are.

Failure.

Failure tests your dedication to excellence.
Don’t worry about getting it wrong as long as you are willing to keep trying.
The sooner you fail, the more time you have to start succeeding.

Fear.

Because I only fear what I have not already conquered, I must conquer all to fear nothing.

Fight.

We may lose—and certainly the odds are not in our favor—but we will fight!
I fight because I need to know if I can…

Friction.

You can’t change the world without polarizing the people you run into….

Getting Back Up.

You can take a gut punch and hit the mat or keep moving…

Getting in Shape.

Getting in fighting sales shape is about training on the hills.

Goal Management.

You need to manage carefully what you measure while carefully understanding that you can’t measure what you do not manage.

Goals.

Instead of expecting fairness, focus on your future and fight to fulfill it.
Challenge tomorrow’ s destiny with today’ s action.
The battle is not so much about where you currently are, but in what direction you are headed.
There is nothing that can NOT be achieved and there is NO ONE who can NOT achieve.
Plan to be weak and you will make yourself stronger.
Every decision you make goes into the results of what you allow yourself to achieve.
Misery may love company, but competition makes the company better.
Knowing what you want is the tipping point for finding success.

Guts.

The harder you play, the tougher you need to be.
Nothing is free in life. Not respect. Not vision. Not passion for your purpose. It takes soul.

Honesty.

Let’s change the debate from being ‘transparent’ to a simpler concept: BE HONEST!

Impossible.

The greatest discovery you will ever make is that nothing is impossible.

Inspiration.

Unexpected Inspiration = When the courage to succeed and a personal dream combine to bring hope and heart to those who observe.

Intentions

Be Genuine. Be obsessed with your own success and don’t apologize.

Introspection.

We all evaluate our self-value. The difference is what we see as valuable…

Karma.

The cosmos has a fantastic way of self-correcting for stupid people.

Leadership.

To lead others you must first lead yourself.

Learning.

Prepare yourself to be amazed by learning from everything.

Living in the Moment.

Life is the sum total of our involvement in it with our ourselves.

Living with Purpose.

Dying for your values is easier than living to fight for them everyday.

Mediocrity.

Building on mediocrity still has the failure of mediocrity at the foundation—which really negates the ‘building’ part of the scenario.

Mental Strength.

We may be a product of our environment, but we can chose our mental neighborhood.

Motivation.

Inspiration is the one thing you lose just after you stop looking for it.
We each have the power to be better and better those around us. It’s called the ‘power of me’!
Realizing our goals is less about what happens to us by others and more about how we harness the present.

Obsession.

Obsession is the persistent mental addiction to a life goal.
Obsession is your way of knowing you will win before you even start the contest…
An obsession with success is not about hoping in what you can achieve, but rather in exercising a personal forcefulness toward ones higher calling.

Pain.

Courage means there’ s a cost.

Passion.

Nothing changes until people get passionate about a cause!
It’s hard to stop passion. You stop logic, derail ideas, and sidetrack plans; but passion is undeterred.
No one cares about your vision like you.

Perspective.

Just because the shoe fits doesn’t mean you have to keep wearing it.
Vision is the energy that fuels the exercise of attaining tomorrow’ s expectations.
The trend de jure is more important than the trend du jour.
Just because I cover my eyes with my life doesn’t mean that reality has suddenly disappeared.
Relationships revolve around perspective: your’s and their’s.

Pettiness.

Pettiness is the suicide-bomber of healthy morale….

Planning.

Despite your genius, things go wrong. Sometimes, things go horribly, frightfully wrong.
Success means making your long-term goals part of today’s problems.

Rejection.

Rejection is all in your head.
Every rejection is a step closer to realizing success.

Results.

Results never lie. Conclusions can.

Sales & Marketing.

A great demo is like a stand-up act. There is a smooth opening where you try to get the ‘ crowd’ to like you, the quick dazzle that keeps everyone interested for the long haul, and the act itself (where every word and phrasing is pre-planned).
Your ability to achieve explosive revenue growth is directly proportional to your obsession with providing an outrageous customer experience. Suck at one and you’re guaranteed to suck at the other.
Sales people are notoriously stupid human beings. While we make our living based solely on our performance, we rarely take the time to improve our performance.
Clients want to pay a fair value for a great product. Totally free creates ambivalence for a discerning client. Money changing hands reduces the ‘scary’ part of a deal.
Winners create a fanfare that arouses action, intensifies urgency, and capture the mind and motivation of a buyer.
The best sales people in the world understand that the real issue is always what it appears NOT to be.

Sales Tips.

To be the square sales peg, start with your title. It’s the first thing people want to know about you.
Sales is a war.
Don’t believe everything you don’t hear.

Self Worth.

You can be all you imagine yourself to be. You will be everything you believe you are worth being.

Selfishness.

I don’t care about you. I care about me. Care about me too.

Start-ups.

Successful start-ups have one really differentiating quality — the art of trying harder.

Stupid People.

Stupid people spend time defending themselves instead of fighting for their goals.
People get pissed when you try to debunk their perception of reality.

Success.

Rate of Success — (Determination of Leader * Focus of Efforts) / (Ability to Fail / Lessons Learned)
Push yourself into the scary position where success is the only possibility.
Surround yourself with a lifestyle of being true to your goals.

Tomorrow.

If you quit today you never get to see the success of tomorrow.

Will.

Nothing is more powerful than the will of man to rise above himself to achieve greatness.

Winning.

A win is a win is a win is a win!
Winning matters.
If I am going to be sore anyway, I’d rather be a sore winner over being a sore loser!
You can’t really appreciate the joy of winning, until you’ve failed along the way.

It takes an edgy perspective to do something amazing.

Just one great idea will do.

One edgy idea from you.

NOTE: While these are all original ”edgy conversation” quotes, claiming copyright seems quite silly and downright stingy. Claim a few as your own. Add them to your next Powerpoint. Share them with your team. You’ve read this far; you might as well get something in return for all that effort. These are all “anti-Copyrighted”…

Why CNN is Stealing your Soul.

Dan Waldschmidt — Thu, 19 Aug 2010 13:03:31 +0000

Have you read every best selling business book in the last thirteen-and-a-half years and still feel like there’s something missing?

Like no matter how many times you step through the guaranteed success road map you just read about that you never really feel satisfied. It’s like your dreams are a mirage. Your destiny is always another 12 months away.

Your problem might be CNN.

No. Not Anderson Cooper, Larry King, or Nancy Grace.

It’s the entire news-delivery business. The 7 o’clock news, the 11PM final cut, and the all the weekend special editions in between. It’s Fox News, CBS, and the Huffington Post political column.

It’s the populist sensationalism assaulting your senses and distracting you from your real purpose in life.

The “news” is on a crash course with your destiny and silently snuffing out your dreams for outrageous success…

You may not have thought about it before, but here are a few things to consider:

1. You always end up being the victim.

Ever wonder why you can’t wind up the news feeling anything less than slightly disgusted and completely compelled to jump off the nearest bridge? Sure you weren’t the person the story was about. You weren’t defrauded, exploited, or physically harmed. But for some reason you’re emotionally drained. You’re distracted. You’re decidedly passionate about esoteric talking points crafted for melodramatic mass impact. An impact that destroys your dream in the process.

2. The drama masks the needs for massive amounts of effort.

The sensationalism of every news delivery passively coerces us to think that getting luck or just working smarter are still viable success platforms in 2010. They’re not. After the worst economic marketplace in more then eight decades, you would expect that effort output would be at an all-time high. And yet despite the frantic demand for obsessive focus on mind-bending mental equity and physical investment, we find ourselves depressed and de-motivated. The antidote is activity.

3. You are never the winner in any possible scenario.

Left. Right. Risky. Conservative. Whatever side you take, you end up the loser. Sure you may side with the majority. And for a few moments you’re sure to get a surge of adrenaline from feeling like you’re leading the cause for fairness. But you lose. The only ones who win are the commentators. Meanwhile our dreams get left unfulfilled while we battle over opinions.

We have to change. The damage is dramatic. It’s the ultimate in self-sabotage.

We cripple our inspiration with the populist sensationalism of unapologetic argumentation. We trade away our passion in the fight to be right instead of examining our motivations for changing the world around us.

And slowly as we look for that extra effort needed to nurture the very seeds of our destiny, we stand soulless, heartless. Without the raw guts to realize the possibilities of an unlimited cosmos.

Stop betraying your destiny, dreams, and business acumen for a passionately-stated opinion.

You’ll find your 30 pieces of emotional silver hardly worth the loss.

—————

Want the 2-minute MP3 audio version of this Edgy Conversation?

Listen in….

Save this to your iPod or the desktop on your computer and listen to it again when you need a kick in the pants.

Get Edgy!

Depression, Dreams, and Destiny.

Dan Waldschmidt — Thu, 22 Jul 2010 13:06:35 +0000

Ever feel like one of these plastic figurines you beat down at the Mack-A-Mole game at Chuck E Cheese? Ever feel like the “game” is you getting your head beat in by everyone around you?

Like life is rigged to keep you down. Like there’s a plan to keep you away from your dreams

Let’s have an edgy conversation about that.

If you haven’t felt that way yet (like you get smacked around no matter what you do), hold on to this article because chances are you are headed to a collision with reality.

According to the National Institute of Mental Health, right now more than 33 million Americans are depressed.

Not just discouraged, frustrated, or struggling with setbacks. Clinically depressed…

It’s a Serious Situation.

Psychologists tell us that 1 out of 3 women are depressed at any one time. That it’s about 1 out of 5 for men.

More then 80% of depressed people never get help — at all, ever. And it’s no wonder — 54% of people asked, considered depression a personal weakness rather than a medical condition.

All-in-all, more than a million people (about 15% of depressed people) will take their own life this year. And what’s staggering — as many as 50 million people will make an unsuccessful attempt at doing so.

It’s estimated that by 2020, depression will be the second largest killer after heart disease — more than cancer, AIDS, and diabetes combined.

So What To Do.

Get help!

It’s that simple. You are fighting for your future. For your dreams.

Find opportunities to help others – Kindness mends wounds. Yours and the person you are helping. Go looking to encourage someone else and you will find your soul nurtured.
Surround yourself with positive people — Put yourself in a place where you can be inspired. Stop carrying the team and surround yourself with people you raise you up.
Get medical help – Invest in a psychologist, psychiatrist, or therapist. You can’t fix yourself. You didn’t break yourself in the first place, so you don’t know how to put all the pieces back in place. Get a pro on your team.

Your senses tell you to wallow in pity and sulk and pout. Like hypothermia, your body and instincts go numb. You have to take action.

The “Edgy” Truth.

We all get depressed at times. Don’t deny it. You’ve been there. So have I.

Your dream needs you. You future needs you.

Are you willing to fight another time?

“The choice to persevere in spite of overwhelming obstacles is the single biggest factor in achieving success…”

Passive Aggression is Stealing your Dreams.

Dan Waldschmidt — Thu, 03 Jun 2010 13:02:17 +0000

Your attitude. Your behavior is stealing your dreams. Your destiny.

Think about that for a minute

“We” are the difference between our failure and everything we want for ourselves in the future…

What we want to be will likely never actually ever come to be. And all because we let passive aggression cripple us.

We might be sacrificing the outrageous future of our dreams because we can’t conquer our fears, be authentic, and take control of “us”.

You know what I’m talking about. (I know about me at least…)

We have dreams. We are passionate. And then when it matters most, we revert to cowardly, self-sabotaging behavior.

And I think it’s because we just don’t believe there is any other way.

But first things first. Let’s dig a little bit into this idea of passive aggression.

What does it look like?

It looks like some of the crazy stuff we do :

Ambiguity – angry kindness, quiet loudness, comical insults
Sulking – pouting at an outcome, decision, or activity
Playing the “Victim” – blaming everyone else (usually includes a high level of whining)
Obstruction — purposefully getting in the way so that progress or success (or failure) can not be achieved
Procrastination – delaying a decision or a deadline so that outcomes get blurry

That’s all theoretic. Right? Webster Dictionary type stuff. You might be reading this and thinking:

“Dude, that could be anybody? And are those bad traits really going to steal my destiny?”

Yes. You know it. Before we get into this, you know deep down that this stuff is crippling you.

It’s the complete opposite of passion and purpose and powerful. It’s the worst type of aggression too. It’s all self-inflicted damage.

Just because you aren’t punching a hole in the wall, throwing a dinner plate across the room, or screaming until your veins pop out in your neck, don’t think that you are a “relationship hero”. Sure, all that outward anger drama makes you look like a moron to everyone around you, but it might be better than screwing up all the “secret stuff” that only you know about.

We all want an amazing destiny, but our own survival instincts can make us weak — cripple our ability to perform at high levels.

So, what to do?

Here’s for starters. Stop saying things like:

1. “I’ll try” or “Let me see” or “Let me get back to you”.

Usually all “cop-out”. No Authenticity. You don’t want to put your neck out there and really be passionate about your own success, so you leave yourself several “outs”. You can always have an alibi for failure. When something goes wrong, you can always come back to the fact that you never “promised” to get it done.

Commit and conquer. Burn the ships. Don’t leave yourself the opportunity to fail nicely. Make it brutal for yourself if you wimp out.

2. “Whatever….”, “Sure”, or “I guess”.

Running from responsibility. Instead of saying “NO” and getting your feelings and perspectives out in the open, we use these triggers to make an awkward or uncomfortable situation go away. Instead of managing our fears, we become emotionally lazy.

Be emotionally aware. Exercise your communication skills like any other any other talent that you would work for. You are letting yourself down when you just give up on yourself, your idea, or your passion.

3. “Maybe” or “If”

Conditional blame-game, decision making. You get put on the spot with a question and you fall back to the old pattern of not wanting to be the person that needs to be the authority. And here’s what’s happening — You are betting against yourself. Your mindset is that you will likely fail so you want to have a prior statement “on the record” that the conditions for your success were not met. Thus, you were unable to be successful.

Contribute. Be extreme. Put in the effort. People will know (eventually) that you are a “doer”.

and the ultimate phrase:

4. “Yes, but…”

Pure pathetic avoidance with a splash of whine. We all hate to hear others use this. It really is the ultimate expression of worthlessness. It says, “I screwed up and now I am going to make it worse, by whining about it.”

If you have to give a “yes” or “no” answer and it demands an explanation, then try these words: “Yes, and….”. It not only sounds nicer, you might actually keep their attention long enough to hear your logic. Plus, “and” is cooperative and “but” is combative.

These are some things to start working on. (Me too…).

Just remember. You have a choice whether you will tolerate your own passive aggression or not.

It’s your dream. Your destiny.

Don’t let your bad habits steal it from your future.

Karma: 5 Ways to Change your Future.

Dan Waldschmidt — Tue, 23 Mar 2010 13:05:23 +0000

What you do matters. Everything. The big stuff. The little stuff. Even the annoying stuff.

It all matters and its all a part of that thing we call karma…

It matters that you waste time. It matters that you are lazy. It matters that you blame others for your failures.

It matters because your destiny matters. And karma is the pathway that takes you there (whether you like it or not)…

What does this even mean?

Right now, you probably think I’m too full of green tea. That I am high on sales book-burning fumes. You’re not alone…

Over morning coffee at my parent’s home a few months ago, I was talking through my idea of karma and consequences with my dad when my mom popped into the conversation and noted that she was confused by why I was writing about karma.

What does Bhuddist philosophy have to do with explosive revenue performance? And why was I spending so much time on this nonsense instead of just clearly showing people how to sell a lot of stuff really fast.

Well, that got me thinking. If mom (who was a psychology minor) wasn’t getting it, maybe I needed to be a bit more clear. Maybe I needed to take the time to explore this idea of karma….

Ready?

So… what is karma?

A simple understanding of karma is the fact that our actions lead to our destiny. That sooner or later what we do (who we really are) pushes us toward our ultimate destiny.

It is self-actualization in the microcosms of daily transaction…

It’s understanding that getting up earlier means you have more time to conquer the world.

It’s the simple logic that getting up 1 extra hour earlier a day for 50 years equates to an extra 2,281 business days (or 6.25 years) of conquest. You win more when you fight more….

It’s easy to say that working hard is important. But that’s not karmic. It’s whimsical.

Karma attaches to actions rather than ideas.

It’s causal rather than casual…

Karma is literally “you at work” building the destiny that you put in the effort to realize.

Then… why is karma so important?

So… if you only get the destiny that you design, what you design is pretty important.

Right?

You probably don’t want to screw that up. If there is a list of things to not flub, “destiny creation” has to be high up on that list.

We all want an extra 6.25 years of conquest. But when we have 18,250 separate decisions to stay in bed or “conquer”, most of us choose comfort. It seems small at the time… It’s just 1 hour.

The importance of karma is in understanding the outcome of individual decisions.

Decisions to be honest. Decisions to be creative. Decisions to change the world.

These decisions that we make (hundreds of times a day) build our future.

Today’s decisions. So, they all count…

So, how can you change your karma, today…

You start by believing that you matter. That you matter and what you do matters.

By believing that what you do now changes the possibilities for the future.

It’s a mindset. (An “edgy” mindset — in case you were wondering.)

It means you:

Choosing to be positive when things are scary…
Fighting to win even when you just got the wind knocked out of you…
Being honest even when it means you get embarrassed…
Taking the time to learn new skills, new talents, new ideas when it’s easy to just “be you”…
Investing in personal inspiration instead of letting anxiety drive your decisions…

Eventually leads you to:

Outrageously creative solutions that no one else sees.
Win more often than anyone else in the world.
Trust yourself when one else thinks you can do it.
Be more flexible, transparent, and personal than your competitors.
Realize your dreams — when you would have ordinarily given up.

And that’s pretty cool in a “the picture on the wall looks pretty” sort of way. But when you really start looking at each of these elements — creativity, trust, flexibility, dreams — and break them down even further, the outcomes can be even more explosive:

Being positive 20 times a day for 15 years in a row is 109,500 opportunities to create a happier destiny…
Winning 1 more time per year could be the opportunity for 30 amazing, mind-blowing successes over a legacy…
Telling the truth just 1 more time a day means you have 300 more way a year to trust yourself…
Reading 1 new book per week for 22 years means 1,144 new ideas from the smartest minds in the world…
Creating 5 new meaningful (non-Facebook/Twitter) relationships per month is 2,100 new people you can count on when you really need help.

A lot of small choices make a big difference.

What if you had 109,000 happier moments, 30 more successes, 2,100 new friends, 1,100 new ideas, and 300 more ways to trust yourself?

Could you conquer more? Could you do some outrageous things?

Probably.

8 paths to domination and 1 big way to fail

Dan Waldschmidt — Wed, 10 Feb 2010 12:51:09 +0000

Here’s a harsh reality: We‘re just not tough enough…

On my wall framed hangs the famous inspiration quotation from Vince Lombardi about football and winning and what it takes to be number one. It’s been on the wall of my office for the past decade. It’s my own mezuzah to excellence and always pushing the limits of what I think is possible.

Last week as I was working – somewhat puzzled over some frustrating issues – my eye flickered over the glass encased picture. At the top of the picture underneath the title, in font that was bigger than the rest of the speech by Limbardi, the following words jumped out at me:

You’ve got to pay the price…

Simple words. A big challenge.

All of a sudden it hit me. I needed to toughen up a little. I needed a little more mental discipline. I was letting my fears destroy my vision. It reminded me a of story I had been told about a soldier in World War II.

Apparently:

A team of soldiers were fighting inch by inch for a painfully embattled strip of island. Day after day they fought — losing men and gaining little headway. Each day their supplies ran lower and several of the men started getting sick. The classic symptoms of diarrhea and vomiting would be bad enough if enemy snipers and cleverly booby-trapped minefields weren’t even more dangerous.

Each night, a few brave soldiers would swim back to the battleship anchored two miles off shore to get more supplies and ammunition. Many never made it back.

In the middle of this sad, miserable jungle, George fought side by side with his band of brothers. While others became feverishly sick with dysentery, he raised morale with his wit and charisma. Things seemed to be getting better. The enemy was being pushed back and the team was alive. And then things got tough for George.

He became ill. Very ill. George got so sick that he could barely move. As the rockets and mortars crashing overhead as he lay in his foxhole, it seemed like a matter of time until one landed too close. And then it happened.

George said that you could always tell by the sound of a mortar overhead how close away the round might be. Your senses perked up when the difference between death and inches is just a few seconds and quick movement. And in a weakened state, lying pathetically at the edge of a foxhole, George and his partner had little time to move. The round crashed into the back of the foxhole where George’s partner sat huddled. The shrapnel completely obliterated George’s partner and gouged deep flesh out of George’s back and buttocks and legs.

Blood soon mixed with diarrhea and infection set in. George had to get back to the boat or die. There was no other option. No one was able to carry him back. To live, he had to go it alone.

And so when darkness fell, he crawled from his foxhole to the beach and into the saltwater — salt ripping deep into open and raw wounds. And the unbelievable happened.

George swam the 2 miles back to the boat and lived. In spite of the odds, in spite of his weakened state, George made it.

And I’m glad he did. George Waldschmidt was my grandfather.

What kept George alive is the same thing that will help you dominate — mental toughness.

There wasn’t a cheering section waving flags and rooting my grandpa on the last 200 yards. There wasn’t a friend putting SuperPoke “You can do it” messages on his Facebook page. And forget about any Tweets with the words “crush it”, “good job” or “best of luck”.

It was icy water, diarrhea and deep wounds, infectious fever, and a ravenous determination to live.

Mental toughness is a process of muscle growth like physical exercise. There is NO magic potion. You have to intensely focus on a few key repeatable exercises. Here are a few of them:

Avoid the need to blame others for anything. — Mean, small-minded people know that they suck. That’s why they are so cranky and eager to point out your mistakes. They hope that by causing you to feel inadequate, everyone will forget about how woefully off-the-mark their own performance is. Stop the habit of blaming anyone for any reason ever. It’s a bad habit.
Stop working on things that just don’t matter. — Not everything needs to be done in place of sleep. If you work for a boss, then you owe them solid time. You can’t cut that out. You can however cut out the television time, board meetings, and anything else that gets in the way of you staying focused on your destiny. Replace entertainment with activity toward your goal.
Find the positive side of any circumstance. It’s there. — Find a negative person and you’ve found a mentally weak person. It takes no mental courage to say that something “won’t work.” Frankly, that’s the easy route. What does take mental effort (lots of it sometimes…) is to believe in something when you are the only one in your cheering section. Make it a personal challenge to find the best in every situation. And tell someone when you find it.
Refuse to let yourself wallow in self-doubt. You’re alive to succeed. – Stop comparing your problems to your last 18 failures. They are not the same. You are not the same. Here’s something to remember: Your entire life has been a training ground for you capturing your destiny right now. Why would you doubt that? Go conquer. Stop whining.
Ask yourself “what can I do better next time?” and then do it next time. — Guess what? Spend a decade or two earnestly trying to “be better”, and that’s exactly what will happen. The next best thing to doing something amazing is not doing something that’s stupid. So learn from your mistakes and use the lessons to dominate.
Actively take time to do things that fuel your passion. (e.g. exercise…) – Living in the moment requires you to live at peak performance. A huge part of mental fitness is physical fitness. So go fight someone. Or go running. Mental motivation gets accelerated by physical activity.
Say thank-you for something that you have taken for granted in the past. — The exercise of gratitude is a powerful ignitor of creativity. Selfishness limits our ability to work at peak performance. When you think only of yourself, you miss out on the real key to world domination — help other people.
Apologize to yourself and those around you for having a bad attitude. — Do this once or twice and you’ll snap out of your funk pretty fast. When you start having to genuinely apologize for being a bad influence on those around you, you learn to stop whining and start winning.

The quickest way to fail is to let your fears and doubts get in the way of your passion. It’s what happens naturally. If you want to dominate, control your thought, young Jedi. You’ll find yourself conquering more.

Seth Godin Inspires Indispensable Edginess.

Dan Waldschmidt — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 13:10:37 +0000

Is what you doing right now something the world can’t live without? Are you the difference between success and failure? Are you truly indispensable?

“So, Seth, do you consider yourself indispensable?”

That’s what I wanted to say. But I ran out of time.

The reality is that the thinking of a guy like Seth is quite indispensable. You can’t really live without it. You may survive. You might be the last of your friends around at 87. But what you did probably won’t have really mattered…

After a string of emails and the kindness of Seth (and Ishita) to take a few questions from me last week on Seth’s new manifesto, Linchpin, I started to round out the edges of my thinking around edginess…

Part 1: Is life like art?

Seth Godin is a legend in any discussion of “changing the world”. After more a decade of writing with a distinct perspective about community and marketing and the art of being the dude that doesn’t let the wheels fly off the operation, Seth really makes it personal with the idea of fear. He makes the case that:

“fear is the dominant emotion of our lives –Seth Godin”

What stops us from being amazingly successful is our fear of failure, our fear of being different, our fear of not doing what we are told, our fear of being laughed at. We are afraid of our own destiny. We have the choice to do something shocking and we trade it in for a few less laughs?

Part 2: Why are we so scared?

Gives us all something to think about. Right?

But, Seth goes further, he talks about the value of what we do as artists. That being edgy (on the edge of what the rest of world things is normal) is risky and amazingly rewarding…

Part 3: Can you put a price tag on what you do?

What a great reminder to avoid toxic influences in our day-to-day lives. I make the mistake many times of trying to win over all the detractors — at the risk of losing my core focus on the overall goal. Many of you find yourselves doing the exact same thing. You get burned out trying to change the wrong part of “the world”. Some things, some people will not change while you are alive….

Know that what you do is amazing, unique, and sometimes only partially comprehensible. And just know that means you won’t be able to convince everyone of your value. Be edgy. Fight for your destiny. And avoid “schmoes” who make you insane.

Part 4: Do you expect a “Thank You”?

Part of being effective (on the edge of outrageous opportunity) is the idea of giving away your talents. They are a gift. Something that you don’t expect to be fully compensated for. Can someone really pay you enough to get the extra mile with each email or phone interaction you make for your company?

That means that you create art. And you let karma bring you the appreciation.

You do what only you an uniquely do and stop worrying about “getting the credit”.

Part 5: Are you doing enough? Anything at all?

Nothing gets done until someone else benefits from your passion (your “gift”). Sadly, we too often trade what is safe for what would change the world. That means that we fight for our “day job” and the pay raise when we should be focusing on investing in other people’s lives and our own personal development.

And putting in amazing amounts of effort is an admirable quality. It shows discipline. But it’s not “art”.

Art is when you finish what you started.

It’s when you close the prospect….. It’s when you finally make contact with a contact that help you influence the decision maker…. It’s when you take hopes and wishes for a deal and turn it into a relationship….

It’s not so much about about what you do but how you do it.

Part 6: Are you the guy who will successfully have bad ideas?

Wouldn’t you like to know that you are indispensable? That without you the wheels falls and the cart crashes to the ground. Not in a twisted egomaniacal sense of tyranny, but in a somber sense of inspiration.

Art is edgy.

From the raw definition.

Some art connects with a large audience. Some a much smaller group.

You will fail along the way. At least it might appear that way. If you use failure as your laboratory for building your destiny, you will find that each time you hit an obstacle you fight to get back to the edge.

Because at the edge is where you’ll find success. That’s when you’ll realize that you are indispensable…