It’s all around us.
We’ve become used to dealing with it.
Used to hearing it. Tolerating it. Accepting it.
And it doesn’t have to be the middle of an election cycle for you to hear lies and religion thinly covering the ugliness of hatred.
Hate that we have come to defend as “free speech”. Hate that we shrug off as “victim-less crime”. And yet what goes unsaid is the crippling effect that hate has on our lives.
It destroys our dreams. Robs us of productivity. Turns our stomach in knots. And makes it harder than ever for us to change the world around us for the better. Here’s how:
1. Hate distracts us from what really matters.
No one on their death bed wishes they would have “hated more.”
They wish for more sunsets, more time with people that love them, more moments worth smiling about. Hate is a powerful, emotional distraction.
It makes us feel in the moment that our anger is justifiable. That our outrage is understandable. But it’s all just a mental mirage.
It’s easy to cripple your business with hatred. You can get so angry at your competitors, your industry, or circumstances that are out of your control that you find yourself running around spewing harsh words instead of working with discipline on foundational strategies that reposition your business to spring back to new life.
You fail because you got distracted by your own anger.
2. Hate isn’t actionable.
It’s paralytic. Hate holds you captive to your emotions. Instead of undertaking bold actions that once enabled your business to outmaneuver your competitors, you find yourself scowling at the actions of those you think have treated you unfairly. T
he biggest danger of hate is that it stops you from doing what you already know you should be doing. And so you do nothing. And your business goes nowhere.
Hate cripples your ability to do one thing right. One small thing. That is all it takes. But hate makes even the small decisions confusing and overly emotional. You can’t think straight. And so you end up doing the wrong thing. You do nothing.
And end up the loser.
3. Hate alienates advocacy.
If you are going to be successful in life you’re going to need people at your back. You’re going to need people who fight for you. People who help you. People who pick you up when things go wrong. Hate turns your friends into enemies.
At first it seems like hate is allowing you to become the “all knowing” leader of a community of like-minded, passionate individuals. But don’t be fooled. The only person in that community is you. It’s all just comedy and spectacle for those watching.
After a while, what looks like community becomes vacancy. You are the only one left. No friends. No one to help you. You have driven them all away with your hate.
Along the way you thought you were creating change with your misery. Too late you come to realize that you were just creating more loneliness for yourself.
4. Hate makes you do stupid things.
Hate distorts your moral compass. It makes you think that wrong isn’t always wrong. It’s fools you into believing that anger and outrage and intolerance and cynicism are acceptable solutions for anyone who doesn’t agree with you. That opens the door to you screwing up big parts of your life all too quickly.
Your business can quickly hit the rocks when you let hate determine how you price products or how you market solutions or when you respond to customers who are having problems.
Hate is a horrible sales strategy. It is an even worse plan for marketing or for managing employees. You won’t stay in business long if the wind in your sails is the anger outbursts from your lips.
Hate will make you poor.
And unhappy. Miserable and bitter. You will hurt the people that you love and destroy everything you’ve worked hard to build. You’ll end up broken and lonely and sad.
Sure there are idiots around you. Sometimes you have to do business with them. But don’t blame other people for your attitudes and actions and anger.
Live courageously. Lead with love. Smile through the pain. And remember that hate isn’t the antidote for things going wrong.
(Clarity of mind, courage under fire, and personal responsibility do that job much better.)