There isn’t always an easy answer to the problem you are facing right now.
Sometimes you have to wait for time to bring your peace. You have to wait for comfort and confidence.
And along the way you have to search violently for answers. It’s hard emotionally to “not know”. It feels like you are being broken into a million different pieces.
But it’s just you beginning to know.
That loneliness you feel is what everyone feels. It’s what drives you to figure out the answers that you so desperately want.
So what do you do when you just don’t know?
- Be clear about the answer you are looking for. In the confusion of feeling bad you probably aren’t thinking straight. Take time to think about what you want to know.
- Keep doing what you’re doing. Don’t slow down, stop, or pause. Get other things done while you figure out the answers to your questions. Move around. It keeps your brain switched on.
- Limit distractions. Stop watching so much TV. That just rots your brain — and at the worst possible time. Do things that stimulate new thoughts and ideas — like reading books and taking walks.
- Work out a sweat. Everything we know about the brain confirms that physical activity diminishes the power of fear in our minds. It stops you from worrying and helps you find ways to achieve success.
- Search, search, and search some more. When you don’t know, you don’t know. Dig around. Make it a priority to learn what you haven’t taken the time to know before right now.
- Ask for help from people you trust. Don’t be a burden, a whiner, or a wimp. But it is OK to ask those who love you for help. Be clear about the answers you need and avoid unnecessary drama. But ask.
- Be honest about your own culpability. Did bad behavior in your past make your current situation so pitiful? Fix your finances, your health, and your mind.
- Get your priorities in order — and keep them there. If you want to avoid this feeling of hopelessness in the future you probably need to change a few of things that used to make you tick.
Despite your best intentions and your ability to fix things once they go wrong, you are going to run into problems.
Sometimes you just don’t know.
You’re confused, hopeless, and angry. The problems in front of you seem so big and scary that you just want to run and hide.
But you can’t do that. Not right now. Today is the day you start finding answers.
Today is when you start to figure things out. When you start to “know”.